Darth Khazakhstan: It bloody well is about da oil

Some less den Loyal servants have claimed, dat I ad some complicity in not entering da clone wars. Some in da out of da empire MSM's pointed out dat petrofinaspaceelf was da biggest owner of oil in Tatoonie. dey say dat was da reason we didn't send da clones to fight. Well da real reason was dey was on da udder planet, planet wasn't quebek.

Planet Ganstan dat was it. see I sent da soldiers dere so dat I wouldn't ave ta fight in tatoonie. My daughters oil company ad da wells on tatoonie, if youse send da soldiers ta fight, den da money gets gone, dat ya build da wells wit and youse need da more money to build da new ones. so yes dis Emperor we didn't fight at da Tatoonie, and dere was a moral reason dat reason was da money, lots of da money and da golf balls too.


Sure I was willing to let Darth Saddam kill da fifty of thopusand of is own peiople a year because deres a higher principle involved. It's called da money. Da big money, not just da golf course, dis is way bigger.

Da Oil companies tink I did da smak up job cause dey gave me da job at da Petro Khazakhstan and none of da MSM's will say da dark side about it. Cause deres some shifty stuff going on dere. And it's going in da right direction if ya now what I mean. I haf to visit the planet China to fill some bags of da gold.

So to heck with youse I'm done. den look altavisty and search for me and da petrofinaelf. And don't worry da emperor Dion da secret is safe with da loyal MSM's. Just ask da Krista Eriickson or da mallick chick, does she look good when da lights is out. Woo hoo,